Chapter One - Zan's side of things.

Thursday, November 1st, 2007
7:00 pm EDT
Backstage at the Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey

Ok, I bet you're wondering where I got the name Zan. It's a long story really. No, my parents didn't give me that name, a bunch of ladies that call themselves my harem did, and that's all part of the long story. Actually, my name is Richie. Okay, it's Richard, but well, I've never liked being called that.

I guess I should get to that long story, if I don't want to be here all night.

See, Jon, my best friend, writing partner, hell...brother, joined this message board on the net. It's a place to talk football, which is one of his great passions. That's where he met Sam...Samantha, she's one of his new great passions. Don't get me started there!

Anyway, so Jon told me about the place and one night, bored, I stopped by. He never mentioned it was full of WOMEN! Yeah, not just women crazy about football, but also crazy about the band. Jon had told them to call him Kidd. That's a nickname the rest of us gave him a long time ago. Well, actually it's a shortened version, since we actually called him Captain Kidd, but you get the picture. The nickname he gave me at the same time was 'King of Swing'. I'd rather not go into where he came up with that, I'll just leave it to your imagination. So, I told the ladies they could call me Tarzan. That eventually got shortened to just Zan.

Then came the infamous bet. Damn, I should've known better, but I've never been one to back down. Goddess, that would be Hathor, a member of 'my harem' bet me that if her Pats won against my Giants that I had to meet her and Lucy, another member of the harem, for drinks when she was in Jersey....for the Bon Jovi concert. Now, she'd already mentioned that she writes these 'dirty, raunchy stories' online, and I got to admit, I was intrigued. If my Giants won, she'd give me a link to one of her stories. I just couldn't resist. Should've known though that my Giants would suck. Just my luck. But hey, Goddess was a real sport and gave me a link anyway. And let me just say, DAMN! She wasn't kidding when she said 'dirty, raunchy stories'. I loved every word and was even more intrigued. I've never been one to hedge on a bet, so....I agreed to meet them. But not without precautions, I told them they had to be able to keep a secret. Hell, I'm not stupid. I couldn't have them blabbing to everybody that Richie Sambora was hanging out at that message board.

Eventually, I was busted out. It was no real surprise really. Hell, with the hints Jon and I were dropping, I'm surprised they didn't get it sooner. Any girl worth her heart and dagger t-shirt should've had it at Kidd.

Lucy, the one from Chicago, gave her number to Sam, and then later asked her to make sure I got it. Sam gave it to Jon, and well...the rest is history. Sam pretty much guilted me into calling Lucy. Man, that woman must be great in the courtroom, because with a simple little, "Hey, I just said I'd give you the number, if you don't call her it's on you," she had me feeling two inches tall.

Needless to say, I called Lucy. She's really a nice girl. Sorry, woman. Apparently, she thought she recognized my voice. Hell, she's a fan of the band. Of course she recognized my voice! But just to be sure, she tricked me. Yeah, and she was pretty sneaky about it too! She got me on a three way call with Hathor. She confirmed Lucy's suspicions and I was busted.

I should put in here that I was really intrigued by Lucy. Her voice. Oh my God! It's this husky, raspy voice that just really made me melt. When she talks it sounds like she's been screaming my name all night, if ya get my drift.

Well, the final member of the group joined quite by accident. Stephanie, or as they call her on the forum, Queenie. That was really my fault. I'm stupid sometimes and I'm not careful what I say....or type. Anyway, the straw that broke the secret with Stephanie was when I told everyone that 'Kidd' was 6 foot tall only in his dreams. That he was really only 5'10". She started adding up all the details. And, well, let's just say she is definitely worth her heart and dagger t-shirt. She agreed to keep the secret, and what else could I do but invite her along on the meet up with Hath and Lucy?

So here I sit, in my dressing room, waiting on Jon to say "Let's go." I arranged for special passes for the girls at the box office so that they could get back stage after this show. God, what have I gotten myself into this time?